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Iím at the event and sheís on the way.
Itís a year now since last time we met.
The music is good, the company grand.
A better chance Iíll never get.
I must choose one day,
Must plump for The One,
Must pick the girl I desire,
But itís party time now.
Donít go over the top.
Sheís only one iron in the fire.
She enters the room.
She beams, sheís in bloom.
Can a smile be more wide than its face?
I stride over to greet her,
My arms thrown out wide,
But of hesitance I see a trace.
ďIím eight months pregnant,Ē she informs me.
I keep my control.
I know that rash acts can be bad.
Iím politeness incarnate,
Recite the conventions,
But am I now happy or sad?
I launch an inquiry,
Must know in what order the feelings arrived one-by-one.
Was the first to appear the chief of them all,
Or was it just jumping the gun?
The brain is just a chemical plant Ė some hormones take longer than others.
The best of them might arrive late,
But Iím marvelling now that I donít feel much more.
Did they all get jammed up in the gate?
It would be rude to imply that that I just didnít care.
Sheíd want me to cry for a time.
But I love her enough,
That her happiness feeds into mine.
Tradition demands that I now feel the bump.
It is firm, it is large, it is life.
And at such a party it is natural to dance,
So I ask her, though sheís not my wife.
The music is mellow.
We both know the drill.
We connect on the floor as of old.
We chat as we step.
She laughs when I quip.
We are warm, but Iím feeling cold.
And then I let my mind work a trick,
Fool myself that this child is mine,
That this wonderful woman carries for me,
That Iíve plumped, and everythingís fine.
The up-swell of feeling,
The on-rush of joy,
Cause panic, and I quell the surge.
Itís only a mind-trick,
Move along now, ignore the urge.
She was only a glimmer.
I saw her too seldom to hold out rational hope.
I know there are plenty of fish in the sea.
Donít worry, I know I can cope.
Next, I meet ďDavidĒ, the cause of the bulge.
Of course heís a nice enough chap.
And I give him a hearty congratulation,
And add my best manly slap.
She was only a glimmer,
One gleam on dark waves,
A manifestation of hope.
I blinked twice, and then she was gone.
Down-hearted? That would make me a dope.
Iíll be off now, David, so good to meet you.
You treat her well now, you hear?
But donít let that baby take over your life.
Oh! What stories weíll all swap next year.
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